Page 19 of 35

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Sun May 15, 2022 3:27 pm
by Ömür Tokman
@Glenn Schroeder
even if i'm a little late. If I remember correctly, May 14 was Glen's birthday. Please correct me if i misremember. happy birthday.

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Mon May 16, 2022 8:20 am
by Glenn Schroeder
Ömür Tokman wrote: Sun May 15, 2022 3:27 pm @Glenn Schroeder
even if i'm a little late. If I remember correctly, May 14 was Glen's birthday. Please correct me if i misremember. happy birthday.
Yes, you're right. It was the 32st anniversary of my 29th birthday.

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Mon May 16, 2022 3:19 pm
by mattpeneguy
image.png

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Tue May 17, 2022 1:50 am
by KaMei
3stPlace.jpg

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Tue May 17, 2022 4:17 am
by Ömür Tokman
Glenn Schroeder wrote: Mon May 16, 2022 8:20 am Yes, you're right. It was the 32st anniversary of my 29th birthday.
When I asked my grandfather his age for the first time when I was a child, he said "I am 70 years old". He was 70 years old when he died about 20 years later.

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Tue May 17, 2022 8:34 am
by Glenn Schroeder
Speaking of birthdays, for those of you who are around my age, if you ever start feeling old just stop and think "The time period from 1970 to the present is the same as from 1918 to 1970."



You're welcome.

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Tue May 17, 2022 8:58 am
by DanPihlaja
Glenn Schroeder wrote: Tue May 17, 2022 8:34 am Speaking of birthdays, for those of you who are around my age, if you ever start feeling old just stop and think "The time period from 1970 to the present is the same as from 1918 to 1970."



You're welcome.
You bastard!
:twisted:
LOL
UU
One of the hardest things that I had to deal with on my last birthday is that I am now only 15 years away from being 60..... hhhh

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Tue May 17, 2022 9:29 am
by Glenn Schroeder
DanPihlaja wrote: Tue May 17, 2022 8:58 am
One of the hardest things that I had to deal with on my last birthday is that I am now only 15 years away from being 60..... hhhh
I would feel sorry for you, but 45 is just a distant memory for me.

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Wed May 18, 2022 1:55 am
by KaMei
12-627517787d256__700.jpg

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Wed May 18, 2022 2:04 am
by Ömür Tokman
KaMei wrote: Wed May 18, 2022 1:55 am 12-627517787d256__700.jpg
disgusting >>>
:mrgreen:

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Wed May 18, 2022 6:16 am
by the_h4mmer
it_works.jpg

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Fri May 20, 2022 1:46 am
by KaMei
AirHornDoorStop.jpg

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Fri May 20, 2022 9:11 am
by DennisD
image.png

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Sun May 22, 2022 5:49 am
by Ömür Tokman
@Roasted By John
.....Happy birthday to you.....

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Mon May 23, 2022 1:54 am
by KaMei
funny-science-memes-1-628639024763f__700.jpg

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Mon May 23, 2022 1:13 pm
by mattpeneguy
image.png
I remember that bit from schoolhouse rock a little differently. Glad they are teaching it correctly now.

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Mon May 23, 2022 6:04 pm
by mattpeneguy
image.png
Seems like false advertisement...

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Tue May 24, 2022 1:23 am
by KaMei
6284d4bdafe48_aosgvi7toul71__700.jpg

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Tue May 24, 2022 7:02 am
by DennisD
Today's Dilbert.
image.png

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Tue May 24, 2022 12:20 pm
by mattpeneguy
image.png

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Tue May 24, 2022 12:23 pm
by mattpeneguy
image.png

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Wed May 25, 2022 1:49 am
by KaMei
49-6286072cf2af2__700.jpg

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Wed May 25, 2022 6:58 am
by DennisD
image.png

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Wed May 25, 2022 5:56 pm
by mattpeneguy
image.png

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Thu May 26, 2022 8:38 am
by DennisD
mattpeneguy wrote: Wed May 25, 2022 5:56 pm
image.png
image.png (158.73 KiB) Viewed 5433 times
I'm calling your murder hornets bluff and raising you a monkey pox!

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Thu May 26, 2022 2:10 pm
by mattpeneguy
I'll see your monkey pox and raise you croc pox.

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Thu May 26, 2022 2:55 pm
by Glenn Schroeder
mattpeneguy wrote: Thu May 26, 2022 2:10 pm I'll see your monkey pox and raise you croc pox.
I have had croc pox. It takes a long time to go away.

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Sun May 29, 2022 5:16 pm
by mattpeneguy
image.png

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Sun May 29, 2022 5:19 pm
by mattpeneguy
image.png

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Mon May 30, 2022 2:08 am
by KaMei
DuckQuick.jpg

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Mon May 30, 2022 11:09 am
by mattpeneguy
image.png

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Tue May 31, 2022 1:30 am
by KaMei
funny-parenting-jokes-memes-parentnormal-5-628fdcd2b6ec4__700.jpg

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Wed Jun 01, 2022 1:56 am
by KaMei
Classy.jpg

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Wed Jun 01, 2022 6:53 am
by DennisD
KaMei wrote: Wed Jun 01, 2022 1:56 am
image.png
image.png (175.55 KiB) Viewed 5267 times
That's what happens when you drink and drain, you mount the roll backwards!

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Wed Jun 01, 2022 12:35 pm
by mattpeneguy
image.png
Completely unrealistic...there's no way the wife would make the dog stay outside...

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Thu Jun 02, 2022 10:45 am
by jcapriotti
DennisD wrote: Wed Jun 01, 2022 6:53 am That's what happens when you drink and drain, you mount the roll backwards!
This is what happens when you give the world cheap 3d printers.

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Thu Jun 02, 2022 10:55 am
by SPerman
I have a mount for my kindle and reading glasses next to the tp roll in my bathroom thanks to my 3d printer. (But the paper is mounted in the proper direction.) No food or drink next to the toilet for me.

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Thu Jun 02, 2022 11:14 am
by mattpeneguy
SPerman wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 10:55 am I have a mount for my kindle and reading glasses next to the tp roll in my bathroom thanks to my 3d printer. (But the paper is mounted in the proper direction.) No food or drink next to the toilet for me.
Idk, ever seen what a cat can do to a roll of tp on there in the "correct" direction?...one of many reasons not to have a cat...

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Thu Jun 02, 2022 11:56 am
by SPerman
I would be OK with unrolling the tp, but every cat I've own has decide to ruin my house with his/her urine. I am not a cat person.

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2022 2:07 am
by KaMei
62679d6475002_2d9mnpqp4a081__700.jpg

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2022 8:14 am
by Glenn Schroeder
SPerman wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 10:55 am I have a mount for my kindle and reading glasses next to the tp roll in my bathroom thanks to my 3d printer. (But the paper is mounted in the proper direction.) No food or drink next to the toilet for me.
Back in the olden times I had a phone jack beside the toilet. I got tired of the phone always ringing while I was there taking care of business.

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2022 8:25 am
by mattpeneguy
Glenn Schroeder wrote: Fri Jun 03, 2022 8:14 am Back in the olden times I had a phone jack beside the toilet. I got tired of the phone always ringing while I was there taking care of business.
Yeah, I'm showing my age, but I remember this guy:
image.png
Rather than run a phone line to the toilet, why didn't you just install a toilet in the kitchen next to the phone?

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2022 8:32 am
by DennisD
Mooving on. . .
image.png

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2022 9:12 am
by mattpeneguy
image.png

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2022 9:31 am
by jcapriotti
mattpeneguy wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 11:14 am Idk, ever seen what a cat can do to a roll of tp on there in the "correct" direction?...one of many reasons not to have a cat...
Why are you bringing the cat to the bathroom with you?

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2022 9:51 am
by mattpeneguy
jcapriotti wrote: Fri Jun 03, 2022 9:31 am Why are you bringing the cat to the bathroom with you?
You're not following the most current post...toilet is in the kitchen...

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2022 9:52 am
by mattpeneguy
image.png

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2022 11:56 am
by DanPihlaja
mattpeneguy wrote: Fri Jun 03, 2022 9:12 amimage.png
Fixed that for you:
image.png

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2022 1:47 am
by KaMei
funny-signs-pics-627e21813ae0d__700.jpg

Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2022 11:30 am
by DennisD
image.png